In my last post, which you can read here, I talked about motivation, and how that often comes after taking action. Well, taking action is hard, right? Especially when you have no motivation in the first place, taking those first steps feels impossible. I know for me, when I’m really feeling the effects of my depression, doing the simplest of tasks feels like having to climb a mountain. And it’s exhausting!
It’s truly a vicious cycle. And it just so happens to be one that gets worse and worse each time. It can easily send you spiraling.
So you might be asking, “How is all of this supposed to work?” And I get it, it really doesn’t seem to make a whole lot of sense at first. And it’s especially tiring when you’re dealing with mental health struggles to begin with.
So let me explain…
Taking Your First Steps
Taking action is all about getting started. Somewhere.
Anywhere.
It really doesn’t matter where, as long as you take that first step.
And I know that, for me, I have a hard time taking a step in any direction if I don’t know where it might lead me. And here’s the thing: it doesn’t really matter what type of thing you’re trying to act on.
It could be anything. Picking a new career path, finding a hobby, trying a type of exercise that doesn’t make you want to pull your hair out, etc.
Whatever you’re trying to act on, taking those first steps is oftentimes the hardest part, especially for bigger tasks. At least, it is for me.
You might be feeling so lost, stuck, and desparate to find a way out. Or you might be feeling torn or conflicted about how to figure it out.
Or honestly, both!
I’ve been stuck in this same exact boat for so long. So let’s jump into the water together and swim to shore.
Step 1: Brainstorm
If you don’t know where to start, or you feel like there are a million different ways things could go, the thing to do is put on your thinking cap.
What are all of your options? And I do mean all of your options.
Like, I want you to list out every single thing that comes to mind. Big, small, sounds silly, sounds too difficult or scary, doesn’t matter.
EVERYTHING.
(Note: Yes, I love lists. Just bear with me here.)
Think about anything and everything that interests you, regardless of the path that you’d have to take to get there. Just write it down if it sounds like it could be something of interest. You like to bake? Write down baking. Reading? Write that down, too! Gardening? Yoga? CrossFit? I think you see what I’m getting at here.
You don’t have to get too detailed with it yet, although feel free to do so if you want to. But for this step, you just need basic ideas.
(And if you want to get really fancy with it, you can even categorize them! Wink wink! But no pressure, of course.)
Once you have all of your basic ideas down on paper, it’s time to really dive in!
Step 2: Research
If you haven’t already done so, you’re going to want to break down each idea into more specific items. This isn’t necessary for each interest you picked. But if there are multiple paths that you can go down, then definitely split them up. This gives you the chance to explore each one further.
If you’re not super familiar with each topic, it might take some light research to really dig in deeper. Keep in mind that everything you explore will have corners and areas that you might not even realize are related.
And once again, anything you come across that sounds even a little bit interesting to you, write it down!
For example, if baking is on your list, you might also write down things like ‘savory baked goods’, ‘desserts’, or ‘breads’. If other areas of the culinary world interest you, you can really spread things out with different items such as ‘food critic’ or ‘food writer’.
Just as with step 1, the sky is the limit here.
Once you’ve completed your list(s), this is where the real research starts.
First, you need to research what exactly is involved in each different idea. Are there steps you need to take in order to get there? If so, what are they?
Then, turn your attention to yourself. Assess what you have or where you are now in regard to where you want to be. Are there physical items you need? Are there things you need to learn, complete, or have experience with to move on to your goal? Whatever it is you might need.
If taking steps is possible, write down what those are.
Keep in mind that they might not be realistic for you. If you have limited resources available to you, take that into consideration. Do you have what you would need to get yourself to the end goal? If not, can you get yourself what you need? Are there other ways in which you can prepare yourself?
You might need to get creative with it. If there’s something you need, but you don’t currently have it and you can’t get access to it, is there something else that might work? Maybe you can replace it with something else that is within your reach.
Don’t get discouraged if there are extra steps you need to take, or if you need to find different tools or solutions!
Everyone’s situation is different, so if you need to adjust, that’s okay! Honestly, it’s a lot more common than you think.
Step 3: Break Down Each Step
With each task or step you need to take, remember that you can always break them down into smaller parts.
I once had a therapist compare this to sushi bites. The whole of whatever task, step, or goal you’re trying to reach is the entire sushi roll. Well, sushi rolls get cut into pieces, right? So, each step that needs to be taken to complete the entire roll is one bite of sushi.
However, if those are still too much, you can break them down even further. For each step, or each bite of sushi, cut them into smaller steps. As small as you need. Each of these teeny, tiny steps can then be thought of as individual grains of rice.
While one grain of rice is minuscule compared to the entire roll of sushi, each grain adds up. So although you might be taking the smallest, little baby steps possible, you’ll still reach your goal.
It might take forever, but I guarantee you’ll get there!
And remember that not everything will take this much thinking or planning ahead.
For Example
My therapist once helped me break down the idea of exercising. Since trying to actually work out felt intimidating, she suggested I try going on a walk.
But because that by itself was difficult for me, she recommended I start by putting my sneakers in a place where I would see them.
I needed to do that every day until it started to feel comfortable. Then, I had to start putting them on just to walk around the house in them. Once again, I had to keep that up until it got comfortable. I think you get the point…
I just had to keep building up to finally going outside and going for a walk.
So just remember: no matter how small the task, if breaking it down helps you get started, that’s more than okay!
Boiling It Down
I know this is a lot to take in. This process might sound super intimidating when it’s all written out like this. But I promise, putting all of this into action is so much easier than it might seem right now. At the end of the day, you just need to try different things until you find something that fits or feels right for you.
The whole point of using these steps is to help you break it all down. Even for the steps in this post! If you need to start small and come back to it a million times, that’s still okay. You know why? Because you’re starting somewhere!
You’re still working towards a bigger goal and doing something great for yourself. Be proud of yourself for each step you take, no matter how small. At the end of the day, something small is better than nothing.
So keep going!
No matter how long it takes, don’t give up on yourself and your happiness.
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